Pedal Trainers or "I'm not a weenie, I swear"

As I mentioned in an earlier posting (the one in which I described breaking my arm), I frequently bike with my boys (and wife, but this isn't about her). Twice a week (weather permitting), I pick up my younger son from school and take him to an afternoon Spanish class. To get from my boys' school to the Spanish class requires going up two monstrously steep hills (all the more monstrous because of the weight I'm pulling up the hill with me). Until the end of the last school year, I did these bicycle journeys pulling my youngest behind me in a Burley trailer. Burley trailers are heavy (particularly with growing boys inside them), but they have a stabilizing impact on the whole biking experience. One feels rooted to the pavement. Also, if one happens to fall (again see my earlier posting), the trailer is not affected. When I broke my arm, my boys watched the incident as curious, if concerned, bystanders. The Burley trailer is awesome, but it only makes sense for smaller kids (until about 5 years of age). At that age, children can begin to bike by themselves. But what does the active stay-at-home father do if he has to shuttle a 5 and a half year-old child from one place to another in a city? Enter the pedal trainer.
The pedal trainer is an attachment for your bike. It consists of a metal tube that connects to the adult's bike, handlebars, pedals (with a chain), and a back wheel. It is essentially 3/4 of a bike (a bike missing a front wheel). Once the trainer is attached to the adult's bike, the adult essentially steers the bike(s) while the child gets experience riding without training-wheels. Sounds like a win-win situation, right? One can take one's child where he or she needs to be while providing training riding a pedal bike. My boy loves the pedal trainer (the official name is the Novara Afterburner). He is really excited when I pick him up from school in it. The unhappy party in the situation is me.
Last year, I would pick my boy up from school on bike. Pulling him in the Burley trailer, I confidently rode on the streets and up the hills. It was hard, but I always achieved my goal. We arrived at his Spanish class: he, an excited linguistic pupil; me, a sweaty, manly stay-at-home dad. How times have changed. The Novara Afterburner (through no fault of the actual product) has reduced me to a shell of my former sweaty, manly stay-at-home dadness. The pedal trainer requires the adult to not only steer, but balance, the child. It is hard and nerve-wracking. It is scary to have this responsibility. In the Burley trailer, a child is safe even if the adult falls. With a pedal trainer, if the adult's bike topples, so does the child. The pedal trainer slightly throws off the adult's balance; more space is required to adequately balance the bike. This makes narrow roads hazardous (and I try to travel solely on narrow roads so as to avoid cars). Yesterday, I was riding with my boy on one of these narrow streets when I felt unsteady. Although nothing dangerous actually happened, I let out an extremely manly shriek. I prayed that the street would be empty. That no one would witness this moment of shame. (How the mighty have fallen!) Unfortunately, I was not alone. My terror (that had led to my macho shriek) clouded my vision. I could only make out the frame of someone on the side-walk. I ardently hoped that the figure would turn out to be a grandmotherly figure. Some woman in her eighties or late seventies who would think "ah, yes. I, too, have experienced the terror of impaired balance. Bless you for your bravery, you, young, saint." My ardent hope was for naught. There, on the side-walk was a twenty year-old blond college student. She looked at me with pity. "Wow," she must have wondered, "wouldn't he feel more comfortable in velcro shoes? I wonder where his nurse has gone to? Should I call APS (adult protective services).?" This wasn't my best moment, and I blame the pedal trainer.
The imbalance also makes climbing steep hills arduous. To account for this increased difficulty I now traverse a hill couple of streets away from the one I did last year. The hill is slightly less steep and less crowded; this is good, but it makes me feel like a weenie. Like I'm avoiding the more manly challenge of the hill I used to climb. Last year, I would climb two hills to reach my son's Spanish school. The second hill was the icing on the cake. Summiting that hill was undeniable proof that I was a fit (dare I say it?) stud. Now, thanks to the Novara Afterburner, I don't even attempt the second hill (it's on a street next to a school and therefore too busy). Instead, I meekly dismount my bike and push it through the school-yard. The school-yard is filled with kids who stare at me thinking either "I remember that guy from last year; I wonder why he can't handle the hill like he used to (what a weenie!)" or "Look at that old fool; he can't even bike up a hill! (What a weenie)."
To be fair, I haven't pulled my child on the pedal trainer enough to have gained true proficiency. It is, also, only fair to note that, as a family, we have gone several times to a 13 mile long bike trail. I have pulled the pedal trainer there, and have experienced none of the fear/ineptitude that I so aptly displayed biking my son to his Spanish class. I, also, think that I should try to screw the pedal-trainer more tightly to my bike. This may cut down some of the feelings of disquiet that I have experienced.
Still, what's happened has happened. I am a significantly less impressive stay-at-home father (bikewise) than I was before I got the pedal trainer.